Forgiveness

(This is a Christmas gift for ~Daisukebaka.  Who took advantage of my giving mood for Christmas.  Hope you like it.)
(The characters are Daisukebaka's and the genre is suppose to be romantic comedy. LOL!  It was new for me to shoot for a genre that wasn't action or sci fi or fantasy. lol)


"Come on, Dakota!  You need this!"  My best friend basically begged me.  Her shorter build chased me around the small kitchen island of my high rent but decent apartment.  I turned around to look at the 16 year old who stopped abruptly when I did.  Her long orange hair was in her face so she pushed it behind her cute ears.  She looked at me with her ecstatic green eyes.  Jen really wanted to help, didn't she?  I sighed.

"Look, I-"

I heard soft pattering noises against the hallway tile flooring.  I felt something crash into my legs, almost losing balance but I used the island to keep myself up.

"Sister!"  Feb's seven year old big eyes, identical to my own, looked up at me.  I smiled.  My little brother was all I had, besides Jen.  Feb makes me happy and keeps me confident that I can keep taking care of the both of us.

"Hey, what's up, Feb?"  I said, happy that there was a change of subject.  Jen expressed her displeasure at my tactic by crossing her arms.  She was probably annoyed that I was avoiding her plan.  I flicked a light brown stray hair from my long bangs framing my face as I crouched down to be at level with Feb.

"'Koda, you should listen to Jenny."

My smile faltered a bit but I still played it cool.

"About what?"  I asked sweetly.  I really hoped that he wasn't in on this because then I would have no choice.

What Jen was trying to get me to do was to start fishing.  Not in the, tackle-box-and-fishing-pole sense but in the dating sense.  After what happened a couple months back with Azreal, I sore off having a relationship like that ever again.  It might seem a little exaggerated but who could blame me.  I was betrayed and damn it all if I let that happen again.  And now Jen, who is three years younger than me, mind you, has set me up on a blind date, of all things.  She's expecting me to start dating all of the sudden with complete strangers.  Yeah, right!

"About umm..."  The little boy had a frown as he tried to remember something.  He looked up at Jen and waited for an answer.  I sighed...again, and stood up to match Jen's crossed arms pose.

"About love."  Jen pointed out with a matter-of-fact smile.  Feb nodded excitedly at my feet.

"You spoke to him about it?  Figure you use him to get to me?"  I accused, fixing my long sleeved pink shirt around my hips.  Feb continued to sling to my baggy jeans as Jen smiled at me.

"He wants to see you happy, Dee, and so do I."  Jen shrugged and pointed at Feb.  I looked down and all my walls were blown up bu just my precious little brother's anticipating face.  I stayed silent watching him.

Should I try it?  Maybe getting out there will help me out.  Other than work, this apartment is pretty much my only hang out.  The two most closest people to my heart are trying to help me.  I agree, I needed it.  I've become a hermit, sitting around and watching reruns of Leverage 'til the cows come home.  I think the TV is melting my eyeballs.

...But, what if it doesn't work out?  What if I'm in a committed relationship and I'm betrayed again?  I would rather not see the person I love in bed with another woman ever again.  My head started to hurt and decided to speak.

"Do you think this will make me happy?"  I asked Feb.  I immediately felt the tension tightened in the air as Jen and Feb looked like they were going to explode in screaming excitement.  Feb nodded and jumped up and down.  "Ya!"

I took a breath in and breathed out as I looked at Jen.  Her face lit up like Christmas lights.  Oh, yeah.  She knew what was coming.  I smiled and chuckled giving in.

"Okay, I'll do it."

Feb and Jen went crazy.  Or at least Jen did.  Feb went along for the ride.  Jen screeched to the point where I probably should see a doctor, then she giggled as she snatched up Feb in her hands and spun around.

"Be careful with him!"  I snapped.  Jen ignored me and snuggled Feb.  Feb giggled not quite aware of what just happened.

"Thanks for helping me, buddy.  Let's go!"  Jen said and took off down the hall.

"Where are you going?"  I shouted after them.  Things are starting to speed up, aren't they?

"Picking you an outfit!"



After three hours of heavy clothes debating, I finally chose, with Jen's permission, dark jeans that were tighter than usual and a never worn, pink blouse.  Jen decided to add gel to the short back part of my hair so it spiked out and added some liquidy stuff to make my long bangs up front shiny.  Jeeze.  I don't remember a time ever wearing these kinds of clothes.  It feels weird.  This whole thing is weird.

I was already at a table in this vaguely familiar fancy restaurant.  Why was it so familiar?   I couldn't even think.  I was so nervous and  Jen was sitting at another table with Feb "undercover".  She just stared at me form behind her menu.  Feb was just happily playing with his fork wearing Jen's huge, brown sunglasses.  Were they really worried about me that they had to keep watch?  I guess that's alright.

I take a sip of my water.  When is this guy getting here?  The nerve of him keeping a date waiting.  I look over at Jen, who smiled to keep me reassured.  I smiled back then turned my face back towards the table.

Now I knew why this place was so familiar.  It was the first place Azreal took me on a date.  I felt my face drop and immediately got up to leave.  But as I turned I saw Jen get up to block me.  Reminding me of what we came here to do.  I sighed for the umpteenth time today and plopped back into the stuffed chair.  I looked at the man sitting across the white sheeted table as rage and unforgivness boiled up in me.

This man is the one who scarred and hurt me.  He's the one who made me wither and never trust a man again.  Azreal is the one who shattered my life to pieces and I still haven't made a move to pick them up.

...But... he's the one who loved and cared for me.  Protected me and my precious little brother.  He made me happy.  That doesn't make up for what he did.

Azreal smiled at me and help up a small bouquet of roses.  My heart jumped sadly.

"Hey, Dee."  His soft voice tickled my ears.  I have missed his voice.  I've missed him... No, I can't!  Not after what he did.  I've already forgotten about the roses he brought.

"Please, don't call me that."  I said softly.  I didn't mean it to come out all wimpy like, more like an order.  It was hard to keep control.  I had to keep the urge to cry and hug him under control.  Wanting to slap him was there too.

"Can we talk?"  Azreal asked.  The waiter came by to ask our orders.  I asked for a weak salad.  I wasn't feeling too well.  The waiter left.

"Sure."  I said.  Not like I was going anywhere.  Azreal looked at me like he didn't believe me.

"Really?"

"It's been two months.  I think it's okay to finally tell me why the hell you cheated on me."  My tone wasn't too nice seeing how Azreal winced a little bit.

"I've told you.  It was a mistake.  I should have never done that to you.  It was all my fault."

Hell yeah, it was.  He could have rejected her and waited a little bit longer for me.  He didn't.  I looked down.

"I know.  And you know that you will never be forgiven."  I said.

"I know."  Azreal said with the saddest tone.  I can't help but to want to be in his arms but I'm afraid that I will be betrayed again.

"I didn't go through all of this to ask for forgiveness."  Azreal laid his hand on top of mine on the table, his blue eyes boring into my own.  I was frozen.  The heat of his hand brought up buried feelings.  I felt tears brimming my eyes.

"Then why are you here?"  I asked quietly.  Why am I still here?  I don't know, really.  Maybe because Jen and Feb want me to stay.  I don't want to stay but I feel tied down.

"I came here to ask for a second chance."  Azreal's hand tightened itself around mine.

"What?!"  I blurted out.  It was stress and pent up anger that made me do it.  I looked around and saw people's eyes on me.  I heard a noise to my left and looked.

For a split second, I saw Jen and her waitress staring at me.  When they realized I was staring back they acted all normal.  The waitress nervously took Jen's menu and disappeared around the corner.  Jen smiled at her using that as an excuse to look away.  Feb was eating a bread stick.  Jesus...

"What makes you think that I would give you a second chance?"  I whispered embarrassed.  I looked at him with nervousness.  I'm just waiting for him to give me a reason to take him back.  I'm...I want him back.  There was a small smile from Azreal.

"I've been talking to Jen to see how you were doing.  I was worried-"

"-Worried about if I was suffering in the grave I call a bed?"  I snapped.  What was I doing?  Take him back already.  A small voice piped up inside my head.  Not without a fight.

Azreal looked down.  That small voice came back.  He better be feeling sorry for himself.  Shut up! He cheated on you with a bimbo and you're going to take him back?!  That was two months ago.  Those kinds of wounds still bleed, Dee.  I don't care.  I don't care anymore.

"I know what I did was terrible. And I know-"  A crash from my left.  I looked over knowing full well that Jen was probably the source.  Her waitress was on the ground with splattered drinks.  Amazingly, the glasses were still intact.  Jen knelt over the waitress saying sorry.  Probably tripped her.  I felt a smile creep onto my face.  Jen was one crazy girl.

"-and I know-"  Azreal started up again.  I looked at him with a soft look. "-you will never forgive me but I can still try and beg for a second chance."  Then he did something embarrassing but thoughtful that made my face hot.

He got on his knees in front of me and took my hands in his.  I'm pretty sure people were looking and that Jen and her fallen waitress had their full attention on me.

"What are you doing?!  People are watching!"  I gave a harsh whisper.  I couldn't stop from smiling.  My nerves were making me shake but for some reason it felt good.

"Dakota."  Azreal said softly.  My heart skipped a beat and I knew my face was completely red because of the heat.

"W-What?"  I let out.  He looked into my eyes and I couldn't look away

"I need you.  I really need you.  Will you please take me back?" My breath caught in my throat.  I was thrilled and unsure at the same time.

"...Hang on."  I said as I quickly got up and basically ran over to Jen.

"Do you really think this is best for me?"  I asked anxiously.  She giggled and looked up at me.

"Of course!  Or I wouldn't be doing this.  Right, Feb?"  We both looked over at him and he had a stuffed mouth with his thumb up at us.  I chuckled and almost broke into a full blown laugh.

"And if he screws up again, we'll go make his life miserable together."  Those words made my insides flutter with excitement.

Now I was ready.

I walked back over to Azreal, who was still on his knees.  I stared at him and held out a hand.

"Come on."  I said with a smile.  He took my hand and I helped him up.  He stared at me with anticipation and confusion.

"No more mistakes?" I asked.  Azreal smiled.

"No-"  was all he got out before my body acted on its own.  I leaned up to meet his lips.  That was the feeling I longed for.  I realized then that I really did loved him and never stopped.

"Yes! Woo!"  I heard Jen scream out along with the waitress.  They were fully ignored by Azreal and I as we continued our make out session.

Maybe, just, maybe, I can trust him again and he can help pick up the pieces.